I love date nights with my husband! They are a great time for us to have fun together and talk. Throughout my six and a half year marriage, I have valued date nights very highly.
When our first child was born almost five years ago, these escalated to a marriage-survival-necessity in my book. During many, many months my husband and I would live for those date nights, viewing them as the very means by which we could enjoy a thriving relationship.
Yet the same pattern would occur each time: We would reconnect on the date –amazing. It would be fun and full of good conversation and good food –refreshing. Our relationship would get a boost of closeness –wonderful. And we would enjoy the benefits brought about by it for the next several days.
But, unfortunately, these feelings would wane. Soon, we again felt disconnected, which showed itself in stress and lack of good communication.
What’s more, I developed the habit of filing topics of conversation away in my mind for the next date night. I knew my husband would be all ears and ready to work through things at that point. Many times I sat on issues for weeks, waiting for the designated date on the calendar to make forward progress. Date nights felt like the finish line and everything in between, the marathon.
But dates are not the finish line.
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